A Very Original January Comeback

Oh, hello!

Should we go there? IDK. I mean, do we need to? Do you want to? We can. If you want. Okay FINE – we will. 

Much to the dismay of you and my mother, I went away for a while. However, in my defense, “a while” in new mom years is like 5 minutes. If that. And I don’t know how that translates in light years but HONESTLY it can’t be long.

{Sidebar. I recently watched Neil deGrasse Tyson attempt to explain the concept of a light year to Chelsea Handler (and also me) and while I think the concept is supposed to be fairly basic by the end of it all I was just like, “Oh. Oh no. How did we get here? Send help.”}

See? I’ve been back at blogging for all of 30 seconds and already I’m not making any sense. But I will NOT apologize! Because social media told me that 2017 is the year that women stop apologizing. I mean, finally, thank God. I’m actually somewhat of an avant-garde because I began implementing this rule on day 1 of my marriage, sorry to break it to ya.

No! Dammit! NOT SORRY. 

Bleh. This is not the articulate return to blogging I had envisioned. Raise your hand if you are surprised! 

A.N.Y.W.A.Y.

The reason I’ve gathered you all here today is to:

1) Say hello!
2) Hop back on the blogging horse, and
3) To spam you with pics of my kid, of course!

I mean…is she cute or is she cute? She’s cute! And exhausting! And hilarious! And totally rotten! She’s a jack of all trades, that spawn of mine.

Honestly. 101 things have changed since we last convened. That little tiny up there? Well, she’s still tiny (10th percentile-ish always and forever) but she’s also big, almost 11 months old! She’s gone on two out of state trips and celebrated two major first holidays. She has teeth, she talks, she crawls, she waves, she gives attitude that makes me question my own sanity and honestly – it’s all just so FUN.

And me? Well, I’m the same. But also different. Nothing has changed and everything has changed all at the same time and you can read more about it in my memoir.

LOLOLOLOL. Kidding. I’ll get started on that memoir just as soon as find time to finish writing my grocery list.

So in summation:

– Hi! 
– I’m back.

But hey, thanks for sticking around (assuming you have) and patiently waiting (assuming again) while I not so elegantly gathered my shit and adjusted to the craziness that was this past year. I can promise, there will be lots more where that came from in 2017. Okay, maybe not lots. Littles? More. Let’s just say more.

Happy New Year ‘Errybody!